Monday 25th August 1958

First day back at school and already John-John has teased me several times. He's always gonna tease me, ain't he? He ain't gone not one day without it and because of that, he has changed my life immensely. The teasing could be both a good thing and bad thing. Because all of it, it has made me tenacious and a stronger person, but it has made my days of school miserable. Because I'm black, because I'm not like them, I am considered a loner; an outsider. Char, the twins and Desda all think my looks determine my popularity. I'm tall, skinny and most decisively, a "too dark" chocolate skin colour. To make things worse I ain't even got no proper clothes to wear. My momma makes them by hand. They're ashamed to be around me and say I'm a disgrace to them. They make me feel like I'm a disgrace but thankfully when I'm home I feel safe and I feel myself. I don't think this feeling ain't ever gonna go away...

In class we ain't got no good teachers. Miss Saunders is my new English teacher and she ain't seeming nice to any of us. She ain't even got a girls name. Her name is Michael; what kind of girls name is Michael? She's tall and fat and she got the smallest feet I've ever seen. She has a huge white mark over her face like somebody's spilled some sort of acid all over. I don't know her too well, so I can't judge but she seems nasty. Although I do say she ain't done anything to any of us to deserve the disrespect she gets. I feel bad for her and know she deserves more. I'll be trying to help her but I know there ain't too much I can do. I'm sure i'll be getting used to her soon enough. She might even turn out to be congenial.

 

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sNrxz-A19WY&feature=related - Cry cry cry - Bobby Blue Bland